Things I learned/realized before, during and after my friend Trixie’s wedding
(Sorry Jacs, borrowed your format…)
1. Do not decide at the last minute what you’re going to wear. Otherwise, you’ll end up scrambling through your limited wardrobe and texting colleagues at 1 in the morning to find out what goes with a floral blue skirt. And especially when you’re emceeing the reception.
2. Again, don’t cram for a gift. You will end up buying stuff they probably would not need.
3. Don’t agree to emcee the reception unless you really really love the person asking you to do it. It’s not an easy task. And don’t you always make fun/criticize emcees? Karma is a bitch.
4. Don’t wear shoes that you know from previous experience makes you slip. And not when it will strike at the most inopportune times. Like when you’re holding your laptop.
5. Speaking of laptops, don’t volunteer your laptop to be used for playback at the reception. No matter how cool you think it is to be carrying a laptop while wearing formal wear, it is still uncomfortable, inconvenient and darn heavy, especially when you’re forced to commute afterwards.
6. Stop staring at your friend’s/the bride’s older brother who was your first ever high school crush and stop blushing everytime he tries to talk to you. Remember, he’s married with 3 kids even though he still looks darn good. And don’t forget that he knows how you felt during those days when you used to write your name with his surname.
7. It’s only in movies that you actually meet someone interesting and with potential at weddings. In real life, you actually don’t meet anyone. And you don’t want to meet anyone after you’ve made a fool of yourself while emceeing the reception.
8. For the nth time, don’t cram when writing your script for the reception. Otherwise, please see numbers 3 and 7
9. Pat yourself on the back for actually feeling happy for your friend instead of wailing and complaining over the fact that you’re not in a relationship.
10. Don’t hold back your tears when you see your friend walking down the aisle or when they kiss as they’re declared husband and wife or when you hug her and realize she’s actually married. Otherwise, you’d end up bawling your eyes out when you get home. Less embarrassing but more painful